Extra Fasting

I just had a beautiful parenting moment that was freakishly straight out of the movie Alien. The little dude has been kicking Julie in the same rib all day. From what I gather, this is long past stale and she would prefer he switch over to anything else.

He's big enough now that it's clear where he's at in Julie's stomach and if you kind of gently massage the belly and he'll scooch around. So, I figure, "Fair enough, we'll just encourage him port-side a bit and I'll be a hero." It even worked...marginally. Not the hero part.

After feigning cooperation, he stuck what must have been a foot skyward (an obviously defiant gesture), then immediately scooted back to his kicking station on Julie's right. We played this new game several times, always with the same result. I assume he's happily blasting away at sleeping (yeah right) Julie right now. Come October he is totally going to have some explaining to do.

The crazy part was when he stuck his foot up. It was just like the scene at the beginning of Alien. Freaky stuff.

Blood Work

I'm getting life insurance. Tomorrow, a woman I don't know is going to come to my house at a quarter after noon and take samples of my blood and urine. To prepare, I haven't eaten anything since 5:30 this evening. She didn't actually tell me I should fast, but I plan to ace this test.

The blood and urine should be different colors.

In the past, my cholesterol tests have been a non-event. My levels aren't particularly high, and the tests have just been for the sake curiosity. Now, if the numbers are good enough, I could save something like $20/year! With stakes this high, I'm playing for keeps.

I've been eating a lot of oatmeal and other stuff with soluble fiber. I'm now a sardine and tuna customer at Wild Planet - whose stuff is awesome. I've been going heavy on the almonds and drinking lots of kale+celery+ginger+carrot juice. I've been doing the running, the yoga, weights... All in a month-long health fusillade designed to help me cheat on this test by becoming healthier. It's like studying - the ultimate form of cheating.

Still, this self-imposed fasting thing kinda sucks. We got these awesome oatmeal chocolate chip and walnut cookies yesterday and they're all moist and tasty. I want one. I want six. I may eat them all at 12:30 tomorrow. I may indeed. If I ate cookies while she was drawing blood, would that mean I have chutzpah?


Popular Posts